Learning To Love Your Body

Silver Metallic Plunge Wrap Bodysuit
Silver Metallic Plunge Wrap Bodysuit

My life has been one big hate-fest of my body. I don't remember how or when or it developed, but I have been comparing my body to other peoples for as long as I can remember. I was never happy, never seemed good enough. It was like, there was always work to be done, goals to achieve. Never actually happy as I passed targets, as there was still a way to go. I've wanted my teeth sorted for as long as I can remember, and have checked out Bella Medspa to see my options when it comes to teeth whitening. 

I was going through the motions of life, hating the way I looked because I only wanted to be perfect. And to be clear, perfection is subjective. It’s also pretty much nonexistent. I was also mentally beating myself up every step of the way.

Silver Metallic Plunge Wrap Bodysuit

The self-talk was brutal - “Why can’t I just lose weight?” “Why am I so fat?”. And the negativity didn’t stop there. I hated other people too. Women with what I perceived as a 'perfect body' were a major source of jealousy and envy for me, and that got me down too. On the one hand I wanted to be positive, and love all women, but on the other, I hated that they looked better than me. 

Achievements I did get felt shallow, undeserved, and were always short lived and followed by a period of self-sabotage. Then I realised that no one else was going to take care of me. I was sick of the misery and mental anguish. I needed to take care of myself so that I could have the energy to get through my demanding life. Something had to give, and what I was doing was not currently working.

Black & White Stripe Square Neck Bodysuit and Light Wash Graffiti Print Ripped Jeans
Black & White Stripe Square Neck Bodysuit and Light Wash Graffiti Print Ripped Jeans

This might sound easy to understand, but it began by simply noticing that I didn't feel good physically with the way that I was eating, and that was a big factor with how I was feeling mentally. I noticed a daily sugar crash that was leaving me depressed and with no energy. So decided to try and eat more wholesome foods, and cut back the amount of sugar I consumed. 

If you're tired of the self hate game and ready to begin taking care of yourself, you may want to try some of these steps that I followed...

Black & White Skull Print Bodycon Mini Dress
Black & White Skull Print Bodycon Dress

Focus on health and feeling well
The first, and probably the most important, stop obsessing over your external appearance and obtaining the 'perfect' body, and instead focus on the way being healthy makes you feel on the inside. This will help you to find a deeper sense of gratification and more motivation to stay on track. Feed your body nourishing food so that you always feel your best, and exercise to relieve the daily stresses of life, to release endorphins, to fight anxiety, and to feel good too. 

Treat yourself the way you'd treat someone else
I stopped being nasty to myself. It is so powerful to recognise that the self hatred is not only unproductive, but that it begins a spiral that takes you further and further away from the things that you want. The PT at my gym really helped me with this. He told me to look in the mirror everyday and repeat the phrase “I am happy. I am healthy. I am deserving of all good things, and accept myself”. 

And you know what? It may take some time to believe it, or to understand that it is really working, but in time you will re-train your thought process to be more positive. Treat yourself with the utmost respect.

Black & White Skull Print Bodycon Mini Dress
Black & White Skull Print Bodycon mini dress

Love yourself first
Learn to love yourself by making positive daily affirmations, and seeing perfection in those so called imperfections. Once you begin to treat yourself with the respect and care that you deserve, the habits needed for physical transformation develop naturally.

Before you know it, you'll see your body transform, and not just in fat/muscle composition, but a healthy glow from the inside. Part of your beauty is the light that shines from within. When you are at peace with yourself.


  1. Great post thanks. As I have got older i don't feel so obsessed over my body and how it looks (thankfully!) and now I just accept it and live with it the way it is.

  2. A hate fest? Oh, Michaela, you're gorgeous! It's a shame that young women are constantly striving to achieve their superficial idea of beauty rather than striving to achieve good health and self-acceptance. Your post is a useful reminder to approach beauty on a completely different road. Thank you.

  3. Bloomin social media ! - we are what we are warts and all
    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

  4. okay - those shoes in the first picture - where did you get them from?! I need!

    1. The heels? They're from New Look x

  5. I can relate to you I've been up and down with my weight all my life. Now 60 plus I'm still a bit overweight but what the heck I lost 3stone for my daughter's wedding nearly 2 years ago. I still try to look good nothing wrong with that. You are lovely as you are so I wouldn't obsess too much. Just be who you are . I think eating healthy keeping hydrated and gentle yoga pays off.