12.10.19

BDSM Dating Advice for Beginners


When it comes to sex, people can be into different things. One of them, is BDSM which can come with some nerve wracking feelings if you're trying for the first time. BDSM stands for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism. It is a sex term that refers to power play in the bedroom. 

Acts of BDSM can be varied and include rope play, slave play, punishment, and more. As you can imagine, this can be a scary new world for beginners so here are a few bits of advice for beginners...

Learn To Talk
It is important to talk to those who you are going to be with when it comes to bdsm dates. This allows you to discuss what you like and don't like, and what is an isn't acceptable. That way you can avoid areas of the BDSM world that you don't want to try and also ensures that you are on the same page about what you like.

You should never be embarrassed as there are other people out there who also partake in this, it's not something to be ashamed about. You can talk to others who join in with this lifestyle, just be appropriate about it, or check out My BDSM Hookups for more information. 

Trust Is A Must
One one party in the relationship, BDSM will always result in losing power, and being submissive. Any time that you submit to should be sure that you trust as you want to know that they won't hurt you and won't take advantage of you, more than what you're wanting. Establishing trust may take time and energy but it will make the scenarios that much more passionate. Remember, it can be about being submissive, but this doesn't mean doing something you don't like, for the sake of the dominant partner. Being safe is key.

Start Small
When you first get into the BDSM world, it can be a little daunting so it's best to start small and work your way up. With no experience, when it comes to this, you won't know for sure what you like and what you don't like, so take it slow. And actually, trying something new might end up with you discovering that you like something you thought you wouldn't. At the same time, you don't want to push your partner past their comfort zone, so just because you want to go into this world fully, doesn't mean you other half will.

Set Hard Limits
You might want to go into this with an open mind but that doesn't mean you have to try things that you absolutely do not like. Hard limits are things that you will never try, no matter what, and setting these gives your partner notice that you will not go into that area, at all. Just make sure to convey this to your partner too, so you both know where you both stand. 

Have A Safe Word
As I've already mentioned, BDSM results in a loss of power for one of you, and as such you always have a way to stop if a situation goes beyond your limits. This is where a safe word comes in. Having a word that has nothing to do with sex at all is a way of telling your partner that you've had enough. It's best to go for a word that will definitely stand out. Surprisingly, one of the most common safe words is 'pineapple' and a lot of other fruits, as this will really stand out, and make your partner take note.

Healthy relationships are important and if you like the idea of BDSM you should try it, as long as it is something yourself and your partner want. You never know what you might end up enjoying, just remember to be safe.

5 comments:

  1. Thanks for such an upfront blog post, more people should be open about Sex, and intimacy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Great post - very informative!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous14:36

    The safe word being named after fruits is interesting. Mine has always been "Faster" but never seems to work

    ReplyDelete

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