10 Things I Never Said Before I Had Sons

Sons are amazing, they truly are. I am so blessed to have been gifted with 3 boys that I get to help mould into men. After I had so much fun writing my post, 10 Things That Mums Of Boys Will Understand, I decided to do this one which features the 10 things that I never thought I would ever say.

Well, that was until my sons came along anyway, and now most of these things, amongst others, are said frequently...

1.  Please put your willy away
I don't know what the fascination with it is. At least one of my sons will have their hand down their pants, their pants pulled down or just walking around naked, with no pants on at all. What it is with boys and their willies. Although I'm sure I've said this to the husband on occasion also ha!

2.  Where are your pants?
Or any item of clothing if truth be told. As said above, my children like to walk around in the buff. They don't care if we have guests or if we need to be somewhere. Their definition of 'get dressed' is watching me run around the house trying to get everything ready whilst they stand watching television with their t-shirt and one sock on.

3.  We don't point guns at people
Self explanatory really. My sons like to shoot random passers by and although we might get the odd adult who will laugh and play along, most people just don't like a gun, or pretend-pointed-finger-gun, pointed at them.

4.  Yeah, I love Iron Man too 
Although not for the same reasons as you, my dear. Have you seen Robert Downey Jr? I mean come on, eyeing up the superheroes is the only way to get us mums to actually sit through one of those Avengers films!

5.  No, you can't unscrew the Playstation!
They just like a bit of DIY. Well, more like, do it yourself and then leave pieces everywhere for mum to clean up. My sons love nothing more than getting out a screwdriver and opening something up. Usually one of their toys that then ends up with missing parts, or extra parts from somewhere.

6.  Yes, I think you'd make a good dragon when you're older
sometimes it's just easier to agree with kids than to correct them and then have a full blown argument over the fact that they want to be a dragon when they're older. I also don't have the heart to tell him that dragons aren't real!

7.  No, you can't use Tampons as dynamite!
That's not what they're for and by the way, do you know how much they cost. I pay tax on those effers god damn it.

8.  Why is there soil/grass/stones/sticks in your bedroom?
Kids eh! Mud is fun. If they're not jumping in muddy puddles, they're making mud cakes and collecting sticks. And everything also seems to end up in the house. There has been a stick in the boys bedroom for 6 weeks and I daren't move it as all hell would break lose.

9.  Who pee'd on the floor?
To be honest, I say this and don't usually get an answer. It could be any one of the males in my house. Even the littlest escapes from nappy changes just to pee on the floor 20 seconds later. I'm sure my kids have a competition to see who can miss the toilet the most!

10. No, mummies don't have willies
This usually sparks long conversations about what mums actually have instead. These are the questions that I strive to avoid to miss the awkward conversations. If in doubt, retreat backwards whilst throwing sweets at them so they forget what they were asking!

It's funny that before children, I was quite prudish and would hate to say certain words in company, now it's a regular occurrence as my children decide to ask me random and inappropriate questions, in public!


  1. I've only got one son but yes, can relate to these. Lots of questions about willows and why girls don't have them!

  2. We have an 18 month old so I can relate to most of these already and I think you've given us a view to our future with him. Love point number 1 and 2. Rowan loves running around with his bits hanging out and wearing not many clothes!!!!

    Laura x

  3. Haha, this is great! I can think of similar random things that I would have never said before having children in heneral. It's great that children being out the inner children in their parents.

  4. This is hilarious. The tampon one made me spit my drink out haha I can defo relate to this as a mum of two wild boys! xx

  5. Ha ha, this is great! I have 2 little ladies, so funny to see what I'm missing out on!

  6. Lol sounds like my life. My son is such a monkey who loves running around naked

  7. hahaha brilliant!! IT's so funny the thing we end up saying, that we never thought would come out of our mouths! x

  8. Great post! so funny

  9. hahaha I love these!!! I am so glad I had a girl sometimes, my things I've never said before list isn't that long. x #love2blog

  10. Anonymous07:20

    Ha ha with 2 boys of my own I say all of these too. Along with my favourites of 'put the nerf gun down' or 'stop playing football in the lounge'. Hoping that girls will be easier ..... X

  11. Ahahaha, I love this! I've got five nephews as well as L, so no girls in the family and thinking about it, at nearly every family gathering, you're bound to hear one of these! Brilliant post, I've bookmarked it to show Gareth, he thinks I'm strange, least I know I'm not alone! xx

  12. Haha, I can relate to most of these! Especially the "why is there stones/sticks/grass/rocks.. LEAVES in your bedroom haha. Boys will be boys! xx

  13. Yup, some of these have come out of my mouth too! Being a mum to a boy is a very special treat ;)

  14. hehehe! I am quite glad I had girls...lol

  15. Anonymous00:00

    Boys will be boys. Loveable.

    Rachel Craig

  16. I don't have children (yet!) but these made me giggle! :D x

    Ashton | Beauty, Books and Babble

  17. Ha - totally relate to this post!


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